真っ赤な花びら。。。

Envy

2011-06-09T21:00:00.002+08:00

I'm actually envious, and a slight grudgy towards you because you get to see him more often and i guess you might be the reason why i get stuck with utter disappointment...

But i guiltily rejoice at the fact that i've been around longer, and that i have amore secured future with them than you do.

on paper you are there.

my life is not written down. it can be changed as freely as the air..

what could be sweeter?

2010-08-13T16:07:00.000+08:00

than being called a best friend...

sorry

2010-08-12T01:55:00.002+08:00

i went overboard.

forgive me.

I haven't been a good person altogether.

i'll stay true to my words.

i am so sorry...

please...

10.+9.

2010-08-10T23:01:00.002+08:00

10/10/10 10:10:10

=)

today's not this date, but its a nice date and time to look forward to. =p

there's nothing special done today, but i want to keep believing that today is special anyway.

lets fly.

with

2010-08-10T02:32:00.002+08:00

'we should get out of the house as soon as possible'

'come live with me'

shiawase.

making dress now.

getting emotional.

lets focus on the bright side..

youre there.

you and everyone else.

[<3]

spammers

2010-08-04T12:54:00.002+08:00

i realize there have been a lotta spammers on my tagboard and comments section...

i thought of removing my tagboard, but i cant be bothered.

i will have to put one up back again anyway

and as if anyone ever reads this anymore.

so there's no point xD

...

NEVER WAIT FOR THINGS TO HAPPEN. ALWAYS MAKE THINGS HAPPEN.

lets live by that.

less thinking of how people judge you.
dont await their reaction

dont even expect it.

now where was i... oh yeah... i have about 2 hours to do homework, then i have to go out...

JCG meeting

i cant tear myself away from them

and frankly, a portion of the reason is because izzat is there.

and i believe that there's a reason why i fell in love with him. could be just him, could be cause my life is not over with jcg, and i have to learn more.. might be cause of the things in between that i need to experience with him.

everything happens for a reason... but if you make things happen, you should have a reason too.

whims are nice, but only if you dont risk anything too important.

well, i know what i'm talking about so thats enough.

i need to do my home work. goodbye~~

Hi

2010-08-02T23:12:00.003+08:00

I want to get back into the habit of writing and speaking my mind.

I'll be blunt. cause i doubt anyone reads here anymore. =P

I'm sure though, in the future, i'd be embarrassed to have written so bluntly. hahaha ...

lets see...

Lets sum up my life so far.

-I'm 19, going 20. OMG WHAT i'm TURNING 20 IN A FEW MONTHS?! SHEEP.

-In a stable relationship, i finally found a guy i feel i can settle with. I don't care what you think, I wanna marry him and he feels the same.

-Currently studying fashion in NAFA... (this just means i don't have income..lol)

-at the moment: facebooking, doing homework.

-New friends @NAFA, getting in touch with some old ones... keeping current ones @RP.

think thats it in a nutshell...

referring back to "sheep" i typed in caps above, its supposed to be a euphemism for 'shit'... the irony is that i have to read a textile book on wool.(Y). haha

allright. lets get down to business, for now, i shall write about the things i'm bothered with, and things that i am happy with...

Things bothering me at the moment:

-Homework. there's a bunch of it. cant really call it homework, but its an ongoing project. shit i havent finish reading n cutting stuff...and drawing and coloring and mindmapping @_@

-boyfriend. again i get frustrated with some things he does. -unfair rant alert. i'm frustrated at the moment so this is just me getting things off my chest-hilighthiddentextbelow

you have time to watch a video on facebook but didn't have time to reply my simple message... if youre busy you could have just told me you will be busy today, and will call me later or something. it jsut feels like you dont return the same amount of feelings i constantly have for you... but then again it might be my problem. i'm a helpless romantic(quoted shaa). i crave every bit of interaction between us. i dont want to feel cheap or feel like i'm loving some inanimate object that doesnt return my feelings.. i know you love me, but would it hurt to put some effort and show it a little more? little gestures help. smsing randomly. BEING the FIRST to sms me in the morning, or call... which you did in some point of time...then you didn't anymore. dont give me 'i'm busy in the morning' i'm happy with a simple ohayou in the morning. a little attention to detail would help too. ask me where i am what i'm doing... if not, leave random notes on my wall, comment on my status or something... you haven't done that in a very long while...T_T
listen to me. i've been asking you to do this one thing for quite a while. now that you dont have much credit in your prepaid number, you should do what i have been asking you to. i dont see a reason why not. unless you dont want to hear from me. in that case fine. i have decided to be the inactive one already. if you dont contact me, i 'll do the same. and i wont send you morning messages for now either. see if you notice. i bet you wont.

right now you're busy. I understand that perfectly. with FYP and other stuff. that is why i chose not to bring this up to you yet. and i'm not expecting you do do all these at once either. just doing 1 sweet thing a day will do....

being too nice and understanding hurts me sometimes.

one request though, can i ask you to be a little more selfish with me? its ok to not like ppl touching me. its ok to tear me away from a guy friend of mine. its ok to hurt me a little. i act fragile so you'll take a look at me and comfort me. little selfish things you do like to not want me to go somewhere farther away from you, just makes me feel wanted. and its a nice feeling.

-end of rant-

-facebook group for JCG. gosh.

-i miss jcg T_T

________________________________________________

its unfair to post something i'm unhappy with without writing about things that made me smile recently....

things i'm happy with...

silhouettes done, got a good nap. boyfriend called earlier, watched some good cartoons read some long pages of what i'm supposed to,found a good deal on a netbook, understood very well in the pattern making class. found good friends in NAFA. =)

lavs

tata

thats all for now. I need to get back to work

furniture

2010-01-06T14:45:00.002+08:00

there i am, being influenced again.
using what i have seen before to connect with whatever i'm experiencing now.

thats normal right? LOL

but anyway.

there was a time i didnt ask you all out to some event.

and now i want to.

and there's no reply

so.

sigh.

dunno la

hope you guys dont blame me later.

twice in a night have i wanted to ask for some replies...

but almost none came
to those who did, thanks.

i DO understand that you guys have other bunch of things on your mind that i cannot fully comprehend at the moment.

i choose not to ask because i might just get confused, then confuse you back.

*shrug*

ok. thats it. bad feelings laid out. now for what happened earlier today =D

morning>

Dini and i went for a job interview for a job as plane cleaners
we were there at changi airport an hour early. =0

we talked, we lolled around... then went for the interview

we chose the 11pm-8am fulltime shift thing.

we are yet to receive calls from the employer. LOL

ok so actually, when we were there, there's this kinda cool looking guy. damn funny.
i was kinda laughing while dini n i were filling up the forms. him talking to the interviewer is just somehow funny to me.

anyway. the interviewer looked at my form...then at dini's form...and thought she was looking at the wrong form cause both our addresses were the same xD! LOLOLX

OHH YOU SISTERS AARRHH? LOL cute sia aunty...

when she saw dini's age, she kinda... ehhh...16 ar? cannot le...

then we left.

DINI: =(

then i sent dini to cck and headed to RP

then saw wj. then walk halfway then he saw his gf then they walk away, tehn at library he sit with me for a bit...then he went homee.

then i'm alone now.

then dini told me the aunty called her ans said dini can actually work at the airport with me,

@_@

yeah. you guys read also like... what this girl toking?

lols

i'm just blabberin

kthxbye xDDDD lols

Ninny

2009-12-06T17:40:00.001+08:00

is cute.

ahahhaha

random.

play DS some more. =D xD

stupid

2009-11-30T02:16:00.003+08:00

dumb bishies.

how dare most of you have white/light colored hair!

how dare you act like...like... THAT

...die

i cant.

i cant move back down there.

stupid show. LOL

ashemelala!

2009-11-25T13:37:00.003+08:00

assuming is bad

ammusing is good.

spelt that wrong on purpose. haha!

a little comment like THAT wont bring me down... that la. that one, you dont know. hahahah

you just lost out.

thats all

i dont mind either

in some ways, i lost something good

in a lot of ways, i lost something reaaaly bad for myself.

for me. that is, might be bad for me, but better for others.

and so i let it go. and you should too. haha

i found something beautiful

i found something ...

something i cannot fully explain in words...
something i can only describe at the least, but never will be able to make you understand the whole thing.

i wish i could share it with you.

how magical it has been for me

how coincidental

how inevitable

how... beautiful... it has been

...

it could, perhaps, open you up a little...

make you see that we've been on the right road to something better.

but we should leave that road to get on the better road.

the path we were on was just a path that leads to the better one...

thus we need to leave the path we were on.

i did.

and i'm not forcing you to leave that path.
not saying that that path is bad

i'm jsut saying that the next road has brought me happiness

and i want to share that with you

because no matter what i say, deep in my heart, somewhere in there, is still care.

i'm not good with showing what i really mean

my actions are contradictory. heck. you should know how contradicting i am.

i am contradiction.

still, i want you to know this happiness i found.

i know you had your own brand, own share of happiness.

but i still want to share with you mine. because its jsut different.

its like, those fairy tale happiness most people cant find.

its too perfect at an angle.

life, of course, makes others look at it in another angle and make it seem like .... life!

hahaha

well then.

come back to me if you have something to say..

i didnt say anything because i'm afraid you'd judge me.

if i wasnt afraid, it means i just dont care what you think of me...

and not caring about something is worse than hating something.

because we become indifferent. we dont even care to hate or be afraid of what the other is thinking.

though we forget on the more frequent basis, somewhere deep within ourselves... well, at least myself, i know you live on.

i wont expect that i still live on within you, and i wont hope.
i wont expect anything of you anymore.
i'll let you be.
and you can leave me be.

and this doesnt mean i wont open my arms to you of you were to come back.

i will try my utmost best if you were to.

but till then...

live and let life be.

=)

be well.

==

2009-11-19T23:20:00.000+08:00

I CANT SPEAK

another mess

2009-11-19T23:10:00.002+08:00

and i became afraid to talk again.

i shrink back into the corner of wherever that is...

kept quiet

sat back

and listened

and thats all i could do

my confidence... where did you go.

wtf

Die

2009-11-19T21:49:00.001+08:00

die.

just die.

everythign summed up into one... die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.die.

lost

2009-11-06T11:27:00.002+08:00

the less time i spend with you ppl,
the less i know,
the more i feel left out,

though i understand that i cant possibly know everything there is to know,

i feel more helpless now that i cant help with things i used to ba able to do...

its like losing both my arms.

i cant even help out properly

and i'm afraid that i'll be a nuisance

so scold me at times... be a little firm on me at times.

I feel so useless now.

i shall do my best to find other things i can help with....

i'm so sorry i cannot do anything else now...

i feel as if i'm not needed...

i shall put myself aside.

miss miss miss

2009-10-28T10:43:00.002+08:00

holy shishkebab.

think think think and forgot.

==

oh well. just solved it. i think.

i need a phone with a calendar!! lol... maybe i'll take over my dad's old phone... which was originally mine. LOL..

there's all types of sickness going around these days...

a bit of fever here
a bit of flu there...

and a bit of heart ache... haha...

i want to be with Izzat.

.

there. i said it.

thats all i wanted to say actually. for now. xD

Afraid

2009-10-23T19:44:00.003+08:00

of being someone I wouldnt like to be.

selfish, too attached to things, always taking and never giving
not considering how others feel

not noticing the things i'm doing, how it will affect others...

those are the things i dont want of myself...
i do realise that no one can ever be perfect and once in a while,
its nice to indulge a bit and be a little selfish...

but i notice i've been doing selfish things more and more

i dont want that.
i dont want to disgust others
i dont want to be disliked by others
i dont want to hurt the ones i care for.

i dont want to be the typical jealous girl
i dont want to be the over-clingy girl
i dont want to be a lot of things...

what can i do instead?

can someone tell me?

how do i express myself,

how do i show that i care, that i love you so much without showing the ugly side of myself?

there's a million things i want to say right now

but i cant

timing is wrong

shit.

i cant live peacefully without all of you

this sucks

i want to go where i feel as if nothing in the world matters.
... I know where it is.

but i cant go there.
not right now
not today.

i need you.
but i cant get you.

this feels like another selfish request.
its like i'm too... ... ...

i hate myself......

...

2009-10-19T12:31:00.000+08:00

http://didithemadmadone.blogspot.com/2009/10/because.html

up my mood.

Sweetness.

2009-10-18T18:25:00.002+08:00

before i go on about "how great my life is", i wanna get something off my back. xP

"i dont play such games anymore"....

i think i'm better of not caring at all than to hate people/stuff... hating just hurts. not just the other party. it hurts the hater too.

-end- ... whatever that was.

now, on to "How Great My Life Is"....

i think my life is near perfection. hehe.
ok fine.

exaggeration.

but i'm truly happy now.

things are going on as smoothly as can be.

when problems arise, they just tend to solve themselves in time.

a long-awaited dream of mine came true last year, and another one came true this year.
it was a fantasy, it was a wish. i just wished it, wished it hard, prayed hard for it, waited for it, believed it will happen someday.

and it happened.

first wish was a decade long wish.

the second wish was a 6 year long wish.

the second wouldnt have happened if it werent for the first.

haha... superhappy. xP

i just feel like going on. with life.

i close certain doors (leaving some unlocked)....

and open new doors.... hope they stay open for a long time. haha...

bleah. i wish i had that Mind reader thing from "cloudy with a chance of meatballs"....

i cant seem to express myself properly.

<3

hehehe.....

today was fun.

i melted again n again....

who wouldve thought this could be so sweet...

i wouldnt have imagined it...

thats why its so... beautiful?.... ithats not quite the right word...

maa... ii ka. xD! <3

somethings

2009-10-11T08:34:00.002+08:00

...

...

...

i wanted to write stuff...

but...

i think i'll keep it to myself after all. xD

maybe next time.xD

for now, there's too much on my mind, if i try to write it down, it'll be a mess.

xD

but i'm happy.

very happy.
^_^

as long as it works.

2009-10-07T21:36:00.003+08:00

*status* sitting in mac alone, is cold and battery gonna die soon*.9:30pm

the journey is happiness, so let there be no end.

i dont care if its obvious anymore.

=p

i feel comfortable and safe.

like, its not an issue.

nothing is an issue.

sometimes its scary. the fact that thigns that scared me so much is not scary anymore.

lol

being afraid is there for a reason.... i mean, the emotion exists to limit us.

because there SHOULD be a limit.

but....yeah...

ok...i went on a different topic already.

xD

i shouldnt be left thinking on my own..

its like talking to myself

its super random and will lead to nowhere. talking in circles. xD

enough la

byah

Dusty is fat.

2009-10-07T10:32:00.002+08:00

omg so fat.

ok la not fat.

I've seen fatter cats.

but Susty looks so big compared to Girl and Felix.

can pass off as white tiger cub =p

well, thats what Shaa told me long ago when Dusty was younger, smaller.

Shaa thought it was a white tiger cub. teehee...

i wanna huggle dusty to dust!!! wahahahahha!!

..............should i hold back a little more?

Lyric Mania.

2009-10-06T02:14:00.002+08:00

cut+paste lyrics...

then i kept only the parts that i relate to at one point of my life, not necessarily now...(english lyrics taken from japanese songs)......

Love Spirits.

Has there ever been a single thing up til now
That I couldn't bear to lose?

She's not with you
She's not with you now
So you can't let go of me

Don't cover her
Don't dress her up
Don't look at her; look at me

If she comes to you
And if I come to you
Would you abandon me and grab her?

She's not with you
She's not with you now
So you can't let go of me
So you can't let go of me
So you can't let go of me
That's why I love you

________________________________________________________________
Homesick

Right now I want you more than anyone, so much it's tearing me apart
don't leave my arms. I'd give up everything
Right now I want you more than anyone, so much I'm crying out
My wish which could never reach, becomes wounds on my shakey memory.

Right now, I want you endlessly, so much it's tearing me apart
don't leave my arms. I'd give up the future
Right now, I want you endlessly, so much I'm crying out
My wish which could never come true, becomes wounds on my shakey memory.
_________________________________________________________________________________

Waltz

Because its not all that realistic, we're stunned we expected more.
We want more screaming, We want more running away
We want them to come closer together,
We want them more to be more upset.

________________________________________________________
Daydreamin

Love is daydreaming, a fleeting shadow

Before it disappears with the illusions, reach out your hand

Even if I lose everything else in exchange

I want to embrace you once more

Now, daydreaming, my pulse races

Wake up the miracles that echo in your heart

Even if reality disappears when I look at it

I want to make sure, once more...

_______________________________________________________________
Panorama

Pretending like you don't know, deftly turning me aside,
You hide behind an invisible glass wall.

If I had the courage to move forward
would I be able to express my feelings honestly?
my bottled up voice seems like it might overflow

The night panorama, search for only me
stop time, and please smile for me
Always just like this, it's okay even if it's a dream, I don't mind
After the "see you tomorrow", I stopped and closed my eyes
__________________________________________________________________________________

Love Is War

This uneasiness has no place to go. It is overloading my heart.

What should I do? Should I just stop?
Such a fool, I am

I will protect you. This is a war.
I cannot stand seeing you get hurt
To be drowned in this love is a sin

I tried to shout. My voice is getting weak, however
No matter how long I held my voice, it never traveled to you

Aa, before I knew it, the dawn breaks. It is time to stop now
This felling cannot be conveyed

This hand cannot reach you, even if I can see you

Prepare for the final attack

This war is not over yet

Love is war

Until this song reaches you ...

______________________________________________________________________________________________

Acid Rain

I covered my ears under the blood red sky
I stopped feeling my life fading away.

Though this heart ache clearly makes me suffer so,
I don't know how to make a sad face.

I stood motionless on the scorched earth,
unconcerned with what is right and what is wrong.

The gentle warmth I had held precious, taken from me,
I lost even my anger, I merely want to sleep but,

I hear your voice, so I look for you
before this poison rain washes it all away

If we can make it back to that place,
we'll meet again with smiles.
Because when the tragedy has come to an end,
we'll see the answer.

The distant shining future we saw together,
I don't think it was this wasteland we see before us now.

I hear your voice, so I look for you
before this poison rain washes it all away
I need you to shine a light on the darkness,
This body about to fall apart needs you.

If we can make it back to that hill,
we'll meet again with smiles.
Surely in the season when this rain turns to snow.

lalala dee da...

2009-10-04T19:27:00.002+08:00

left alone, i can be dangerous...

especially to myself...

random thoughts + pessimism will weaken me.

loneliness kills me.

....

tee hee!

=x

GAAAAAAAAAAHHH

2009-10-03T18:14:00.001+08:00

WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT INNER PEACE I FOUND THE OTHER DAY?!!!!

AND WHAT ABOUT THAT THING I TOLD MYSELF!!!

"SWEET ON ITS OWN".... LEAVE IT AT THAT! SOMETIMES THE BIG PICTURE IS ELUSIVE!!!

GAAAAAAAAH!!! JUST GIMME BACK MY INNER PEACE WAAARGHH AHAHAHAHAHAHHA

bleh

2009-10-03T17:53:00.002+08:00

thats why i have conflicts with myself i guess....

thats why i cant seem to make a decision sometimes.

thats why i contradict myself at times.....

coz i'm looking at things in too many ways.

i'm trying to satisfy everyone.

i'm trying to make everyone happy at once.

..... well... i try..

i must remind myself.... i cant do that all the time.

must take the next best thing.

if soemone notices my mistake about to be made again, remnd me.

=3

i can take advices/comments. if i go silent, means i'm taking it in, breathing it, thinking it over. trying to weave it into myself.

that can look like i'm not happy about the comment sometimes. [><] eheh.

ahh stop blogging eda,

more rubbish will come out.

deal with the emptiness first.

its driving you crazy...thats why you're thinking about this too much.

dont think about it.

The Sky.

2009-10-03T17:17:00.002+08:00

ee. i was about to write something corny.

its beautiful in a sense, but...

ee... looking at it an another angle.... ewww...

yeah i guess i've been looking at things in a different way.
angles.
LOL... heels.

umm... i dont mean it literally though...the angle thing.hahah

i can see how writing something that seems like a beautiful idealistic idea can look so corny and fairyfale-ish to others....

coz i saw it myself. how corny it is.

then i re-play random conversations i had with anyone in the past week.

i realize, at times, i didnt get their point(i think), and i reply in a weird way coz i was probably stiff....afraid?

then i feel like going back to the person, reminding them of the conversation and telling them what i really mean. LOL...
>< argh...

silly me.

move.

eda has to move more.

but i'm afraid.

haha.

move...

i look disgusting.

just move...

aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh

fmrnodfb gr

ahah

enough.

oh so there's 2 songs now? >.> geh

2009-10-03T08:44:00.001+08:00

"endure"

"perhaps.. it started a long time ago"....

just that i hadnt noticed, it had not been given a chance to bud.

banananaaaa!!!

Dear Online diary...

2009-09-28T18:47:00.000+08:00

i hate you.

hahahahahahha

lol..

bye.

Dammit.

2009-09-27T10:52:00.003+08:00

I've been read like an open book. oh noes! oh nose!
lol...

its scary if everyone were to know everything about me, even stuff i want to hide.

“everyone has one or two secrets they never want to reveal to others.but they also want at least one person to accept everything about them, no matter how much they suffer or how painful it gets.”

—	BaroqueHeat

lol...

hmm...lets see now...yesterday...

teehee~
We went to Ninomiya san's house to make sushi... i kept almost cracking jokes that only other members in teh IG understands. == I stopped myself in time though...

oh, and once or twice, while learning how to make the sushi, we got distracted by the television in her kitchen

NINOMIYA SAN HAS A TELE AND AIR CONDITIONING IN HER KITCHEN~@ lolol...

she also has 2 cute dogs that the rest kept playing with.Hanachan and Daisy. i like dogs too, i'm jsut not used to animals jumping up to me that quick. my cats are like... sllllooooowwwwllllyyy walk to me, sllloooowwwly jump on the sofa next to me.LOL...

our sushi kinda failed.... its not an epic fail, but jist slightly fail. coz maybe we left if uncut for too long or we never pack it tightly enough.

i think thats it.

i went home on the kind of lateness my mom will nag at me at.

but she didnt

she just took my comp away about an hour later.

maa...

guess its fine. lol

okay. i cant think of anything else to write...

coz there are other things on my mind now...

ja! byabya.

this happened more than once,

2009-09-26T14:02:00.002+08:00

a path i paved, i aimed for is there in my sights, i jsut have to pluck some courage and strenght to pounce on it...

then another path opens for me, inviting me, a path i dont need to put much effort on, it seems.

what should i do?...lol

one, another or both.

2009-09-26T13:59:00.001+08:00

do i have to break one thing to get another?
i'm afraid that if i keep both, one would think i either am not serious, or i am greedy.

heh in the end i get afraid... EDA, GO FORTH AND DO THE SQUIGGLY!!!

oh.. ok. squiggly it is...

no matter how non-convincing it looks, dont set me aside so soon. =)

oh ya...

2009-09-25T18:36:00.001+08:00

i forgot to write something...

i find myself troublesome when in love ==

lol. out of the blue.

time is cruel

2009-09-25T18:27:00.002+08:00

it takes so long for something to be given back, to heal, to form.
it takes just a moment for something to be taken away, to be destroyed, to vanish.

thats one of the reasons i get so scared sometimes.

coz if i accidentally or not destroy something, it might take such a long time to be rebuilt... and re-building might not mean it'll be the same as before.

and if i dont take the opportunity, there might never be the same opportunity ever again.

time doesnt let you have certain opportunities twice.

thats how cruel it is.

tell me some of your good points, time.
tell me the good attributes you have that may somehow change my mind about how cruel you are.

no, dont tell me...

SHOW me.

who would have known.

2009-09-24T20:04:00.002+08:00

its either i'm tired that i feel so down, or coz my whole buncha friends just left my house.

i miss them already...=( not just them who came to my house earlier.. everyone perhaps.

i tell you, i'll die soon. as in inside... i'll die inside.

I'm dying alraedy thinking i wont be a ble to meet them as much as i'm doing so now.

i'll die a harsh, lonely cruel death(inside my heart) soon.

because the inevitable is here. it caught up to me.

=p

haha.

ultimately, tis my choice, my fault, my own doing.

but...

ahh. I decided.

doesnt matter what happens after.

i feel that i've not been as much of a great friend as JCIG ppl have been to me.

i feel that i dont really deserve this much.

i'm sorry guys..and girls...

i'm not sure what i'm saying. actually.

i'm trying to figure out my feelings... lol. maybe now's nt the time coz maybe this fatigue is making me think negatively..

but in anycase...

i hope i wont be forgotten.

its selfish of me to ask of that. but...

onegaishimasu...

sumimasen....

tehe! ... a reflection of yesterday.

2009-09-23T11:43:00.004+08:00

yesterday was one of those Great days~

the word great got stuck to me. coz of that lady MC from the Rakugo in English.xD

MC: how are you~?
Audience: good/ok/fine,,,
MC: nonono, i want to hear 1 answer, 'great'... how are you~?
Audience: great~
MC:how is the hall~?
Audience great~
MC: how do i look~?
Audience:(laughingly) Great~~!

LOL...

well, back to the day.

i planned to come earlier, but i couldnt wake up on time to be an hour early.
oh well.

i rushed to prepare because it was almost time for me to go out or i'd be late.
Heels made me miss a bus. LOL... i walk slower than normal in heels.

and i'm not that graceful either. =\

lets skip the tiny details...

i got on the next bus, Brenda smsed, She wasnt late!

i bought her breakfast, we met up at 169 bus stop, we went to school together, we saw Bo, MH, Trevor,Amos,WJ,Shem, Woon Fung(Akiha)... then we headed to class.

and we had jap class. i forgot to send them the class notes. ==

Throughout the day i noticed i couldnt really do my best (mind keep wandering on to FB,cant think of suggestions for gakuensai, and kept waiting for Richard... cos HH matters, and the matter i want to ask about, has to do with booking places n stuff... i do think Richard is the man to talk to about this. Ninomiya san has other things to worry about...ne?

after class, we had lunch at TRCC...

cuteness. I GOT TO MAKE A SOUND WHILE BLOWING AT THE BOTTLENECK!
yeah. i never have been able to do that.

went back to class, got shot by nerf gun, played a dare or dare game...

the game was fun because the victim has to interact with some people who are not playing the game...

and those people dont know what they are about to do. because we're typing the dare through MSN. .. in that aspect. its more fun. xD

then came origami... u know... the usual.

then was meeting. Richard didnt turn up. oh well.

i was afraid of being late or what. so we rushed off to the interchange....
i said goodbye to the rest but... GEH i forgot Brenda? [><]!

i feel quite bad actually, i was real quiet on meetings and all. i wasnt cooperating(? is that the word.. ) like ususal.... I bothered Izzat alot with my constant worries about the confirmation email, the shoes, i made him have to bring his laptop along =( AHH... I'll make it up. i shall do my job properly from thursday.

the secretary slacks at times. now you know.
We'll do better.
I'll do better.
Please forgive me for yesterday. I cant say i'd never do it again because i might do it again(never on purpose of course)... but please dont condemn me just because ofyesterday. ...

yeah. i'm so afraid of what ppl think.. i am. ... ...[><]

continuing...

Met Dini at the interchange, got drinks for making her wait, then waited for Izzat to come back from getting shoes... (afraid that the prestigious Raffles hotel wont let us in with slippers)[><]

even in heels, i cant beat my own younger sister's height. D;
and Matthew could see Izzat coming from some distance away. i couldnt.
Matt cheekily slid down to my 'level'(height) and said "oh ya hor"(cannot see Izzat from my height) ==

we got on the train.

i laughed all the way there....

Dini thought i was looking behind her as she sat beside me.

she tured to see someone's butt.

its not funny if you read it. but i just put it here to disturb Dini when she reads it later. ahhahahah.

so Matthew lead us to Raffles hotel, asked for directions to Jubilee Hall, found escalator there, Matthew finally realising why the fuss about Izzat's 'fuzzy' jacket, then we registered and got the tickets to get in the Hall.

Rakugo in English was not what i expected at all!

it was better! xD

'only smart people will understand Rakugo jokes... so you can go back to your friends and families and tell them... I"M SMART!" ....

LOL!!!

there was the rickshaw joke,

the ways Rakugo may portray different things,

and the Zoo joke... xD

the atmosphere wasnt stiff at all.
and the seats are wooden(with cushions of course) . Jubilee hall was 'classic coolness' xD

my parents came to fetch me afterwards. Gave Izzat a ride home...LOL.... Dini was like: "here kitty kitty~" coz he seemed so shy about approaching my dad's car ...HAHAHAHA

hmm.. yeah... i was labeled 'stalker secretary'.... [D:<]! LOLOL
just cause i can remember full names of most ppl in JCIG...

*shrug* i'm the secretary. and i see most ppl's names almost everyday. they get stuck to me.xD

hmm... after we dropped Izzat at his block, my parents topped up the fuel and we went home...

mom took my laptop away.

i felt uber tired.

i slept really soon after i bathed.

K.O.-ed...*splat* ..*log*....

end of reflection of yesterday. conclusion: Eda= determined to do better next time+ happies

the way you did once upon a dream...

2009-09-22T00:38:00.001+08:00

expectations.

...

ahh..

...

forget it.

lol

2009-09-20T22:17:00.001+08:00

HAH! now you know how it feels like.

see? see? xD

Nostalgic song

2009-09-20T10:17:00.002+08:00

I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream,
I know you the gleam in your eyes are so familliar a gleam,
Yes, I know its true that visions are seldom all they seem,
but if i know you, i know what you'll do...
You'll love me at once, the way you did once upon a dream.

i wonder if anyone(without looking up the lyrics on the internet) could remember this song from a classic Disney animated movie...

hmm.. i'm tumbling this.

its not what you think.

2009-09-18T11:27:00.002+08:00

its not what i think either.

because my blog posts are written on a whim; in the spur of the moment.

it might not be true anymore the moment i hit the "publish post' button.

for example, i panicked on the last post.

then i fell to frustration and soon gave up. so i wrote what i was feeling.

writing calms me down, evens out my feelings.

i wrote this once as my facbook status: i dont have anyone i can talk to about some stuff. and even if i did, it always never seems to be the right time... so i write.

WJ, thats kinda why i'm always emo on my blog. =p

coz all the happiness was already expressed when i'm out there. not in this red box of gloom(referring to the blogsin i'm using now =p)

after the mood was so high up there, after the goodbyes, its like...total loneliness.
of course my mood shoots down.*shrugs. oh well.

anyway. rarely anyone reads here. so its fine. i'm free to write what i want.

speaking of writing... maybe i'll stay in today to write a story.

heavy rain tend to inspire me especially when i'm in my room, watching it fall. =D?

right. thats all.

for now

forget it

2009-09-16T23:10:00.003+08:00

i might just disappear in the next few days.

i hope i dont.

i feel bad asking others for help.

i feel like i've asked too much.

its hard to keep up sometimes.

and there i am, still selfish over my own desires.

if i cant have it one way, why do you also close my only other option??

what happened to "there's always a way, there's always an option"...

kurushii yo

...

well i have a will.

and i dont mind it it kills me.

its killing me enough right now, not being able to.

it'll hurt less even if anything else happens as i go.

...

i'm starting to talk crap again.

i know what i'm doing.

the thought of not being able to go just really seized me by the throat for quite a bit.

.... here i go.

(on a lighter note... there goes my plans for wearing skirt tmr.)

strength and weakness

2009-09-16T19:30:00.002+08:00

who wouldve thought this one thing can erase the thought of all the rest?

who wouldve thought things would have come to this?

who would've thought letting something out will restrain me even more?

who would've thought?

certainly not I.

I wouldnt have thought.

hahahhaha

random sentences.

2009-09-15T23:36:00.003+08:00

i'm like that; i've yet to learn to restrain myself in that certain aspect.

i really have a few deep dark secrets no one will ever expect happened to me.

i feel satisfied for today; let out some stuff i've been meaning to say.

Brenda is my mommy!!! LOL... nah... make her sound so old... jie jie can? =p

Geh. i think about my past and i fiind it quite tragic in a certain way ... oTL (more towards socializing, i think)

JCIG is [<3]

myah. i nyan nyan too much today.lolness.

overall happy.

i hope can continue this way.

i hope i dont be to hasty.

i mess things up when i'm too hasty.

i've already missed one part of... something. i dunno if its still there.

thats why i'm hesitant. =p

i kept forgetting that part really.

pppppffft.....

*b*.......

ARGH!! FORGOR TO DO STUFF!!!

x=

kbya

noooooooooooooooooooooo

2009-09-13T16:05:00.000+08:00

...er

i wanted to write something....

but i dont know what to write....

er...

i forgot...

=P

bye,

Slept it all away.

2009-09-12T19:30:00.000+08:00

i had trouble sleeping last few days.

i kept thinking wether i should or shouldnt, what should i do if i didnt, what could happen if i did.
i thought of giving up, i ended up not being able to. i kept thinking even though (i think) i know it'll be fine without too much thought.

i was irritated/angry with someone.

someone never failed to cease to irritate me with almost everything he does since... since i forgot when. not too long ago but i cant remember when. what contradiction to his own words. maybe thats to harsh, but ... ARGH. get the hell off my back.

...
yeah, but i woke up this evening and i didnt feel anything anymore.

nothing.

not even hyper/smiley.

i tried to hype myself up... doesnt work.

haha.

but at times like these, it feels kinda peaceful. I'm not happy or anything, but its better than being in conflict with myself. at least i'm not sad either. or angry. ...

Today~

2009-09-12T03:26:00.008+08:00

If you know you've caught my attention,seize the opportunity, never let go.it might never happen again,even if it does, the effort to get it or keep it is vast.up to a million times harder.the chance you see now may be a miracle.
Today's plans:(EDIT: Cancelled at 6:30am by mom.. == ALL of it. stay home and clean house instead. ..heh. oh well..)

6am Leave home to cycle to CCK
8am-12pm in class.
12pm take the MRT from Eunos to Woodlands.

no specific time from here.

Cycle from Woodlands to BP(home)

...

yeah, i want to know how long it will take to cycle from BP to woodlands...
coz my mom ran out of money this month and she cant top up my EZlink card.
I expect my card to empty out the moment i leave woodlands MRT later...

so i'll have to cycle around to and from RP for Jap classes from now on.

sound like an adventure to me xD

eda doesnt get much excersize anyway.

so here goes!

Why SMSing my mom is Dangerous.

2009-09-11T20:40:00.000+08:00

there had been many a time when my mom saw chances of pulling pranks on my, or my sister's friends.
And all of those chances come from one source: the phone.

i used my first phone number for about a year or two, then passed it to my mom when i changed to my current number.
that first number has also been passed to my sister then back to my mom...

Thats one of the chances where she can prank our friends.
some of our friends dont know that we changed numbers, so still sms my mom's current number...

E.G.: (ST is my sis's friend)

ST>hello, what color is your family's Hari Raya costume this year?
mom(without my sis knowing)> we're wearing stripey, spotty dotty furry costumes this yesr. animal theme.
ST>animal theme? how's that?
mom>my dad's wearing lion, my mom's wearing zebra, and mine is a monkey. it has a tail at the back, so i have to jump around in the costume.
ST>....(doesnt reply for quite a while)
ST>oh, so do your relatives live in the zoo? you're wearing the costumes when you visit them?
mom> yes,d o you want to join us?(or soemthing like that? i cant really rememebr when my mom was reading the messages to me)

....
LOL... this prank is still going on while i'm typing. my mom is waiting for ST's reply...

other times when she can prank our friends is when i leave my handphone lying around.
and to those who know me well, i do that A LOT, right? =x
hahas, so when any of my friends sms, and she finds my phone, dangerous things happen....

this one was years ago... i cant remember it too well, but its something like this...

ZK>hello, what are you doing?
mom>digging my mose
ZK>huh?
mom>do you want me to dig yours too?
ZK>lol, i'll bite your fingers off first.
mom> if you do that, i'll pull out your teeth! (she spelt teeth in a weird way in malay)
ZK> ...wha?(starts to get angry at this point)

and thats when i came in the room, seeing my mom giggling with my sis....
my gosh... DId i have to explain a lot after that!

This HP-SMS-prank thing that my mom does happened more than 5 times already...

so to all my dear friends who SMS me or my sister,
and get this kind of answer, something that seems off, is not my style of randomness....

its probably my mom.

play along if you wish to =p

entertain her a bit xD

LOLOL x3

^_^

In My Dream

2009-09-11T17:25:00.000+08:00

In My Dream last night, i dreamt what seemed impossible, even in a dream.
In my dream last night, i dreamt the end was near, or so it seemed.

I had to say it. i just had to.
as it turned out, what i thought was true...

you asked that i say it again,
oh dear the embarrassment!
in a few seconds i gave in,
there we stood for a moment...

the expresion you wore,
a dazzling masterpiece,
i just stared for an eternity,
i just felt at peace.

though its all so obvious,
you kept me guessing,
i just knew it, i just do,
i just wanted to hear it from you.

we roamed around,
hand in hand,
i forgot the places we went,
till i woke up again.

a sweet little dream,
i sat up and sighed,
If only it were real,
if only you were mine...

-Eda

Haha. random messy poem..... NOT TO MENTION CHEEZY.. holy biskets... why the hell did i write that. ..LOL...
guess it just seems like a waste of effort if i were to erase it completely.

Dreams like this just reminds me of the similar past dreams i had.

in many of them, i cant seem to clearly see/ remember the faces of the person i'm with.
but still, i can remmeber significant features of them... or are the all the same person?

0_0

LOL. thed's be slightly freaky coz it'll be the same person over n over appearning in my dreams...
like some kind of Dream stalker.

hahah

just show your face alraedy~ =p

lol...

....i think i'm feeing some withdrawal symptoms from my overdose of JCIG. lol.

love them to bits n pieces!

confidence

2009-09-09T03:01:00.000+08:00

i always had little confidence.

it takes me a long time to build up confidence.

...i suck.

i cover up my lack of confidence with my craziness many times.

and with that random craziness, i find some form of confidence.

and i continue to be confident from that craziness.

i just exposed myself.

coz i'm afraid now.

i have minimal confidence at this point of time.

calmer.

2009-09-09T00:28:00.000+08:00

i recalled the beginning.

the triggering series of events.

i realize how human i am...lol

in a way, it fits with this thing i perceive as destiny.

the sick joke that life likes to play on me. on most of us.

in the end it just fits beautifully together.

just so beautifully....

The truth about it.(i'm thinking about it as i write)

2009-09-08T12:12:00.000+08:00

thinking back, i've been bullied.(by a specific group of people of the social community in most schools in SG)

during primary sch,
during secondary sch.

so when I realized some thing...
it scared me.

so i dont know what to think, really.
i dont really group what i realize with 'them'..

i think...that its different.

the 'trauma' is still there though.

...lol.
i feel like erasing everything i just wrote.

anyway, its kinda a miracle i got to this point.

but i'm afraid.
of a lot of things.

i think it may be best if i leave it alone completely.

but it'll be..'sad' to do so.

timing is almost everything.

it'll be very sad to just pass by each other like that.

lol...like in drama like that.

ok. i've said enough.
rather, i've said enough of what i want to.
i guess so...

i dreamt a lot of dreams last sleep,
i cant remember all of them, but...

some of them involved...opening and closing large gates? i think? for my comrades...

...EH! i just realized that its super similar to when we had Richard's card and had to open the practice rooms whenever someone needs something from it during jcig camp! 0_0

lol.

things are starting to pick up pace again.
its going to get real busy.

i hope i'm ready.

Fire, dont die out just yet.

juudaime.. @_@

2009-09-07T22:41:00.000+08:00

http://didithemadmadone.blogspot.com/2009/09/juudaime.html

my sis posted this up on her blog...

the vid... @_@

LOLS!

"in camp, we trust!"
I feel like putting that as the tagline for the JCIG camp. LOL

since all the guys just trust each other so much.

girls, we shall do the same some other time, ok?!

we must join in the spirit of trusting each other!

...lol...

wth am i saying,xD

i slept the whole day off today....
was really tired i guess..

i feel restless afterwards...
like there's lack of people around.

its too quiet T_T

maybe its just coz during camp, wherever i look, there's always someone.

nyaaa. this sux.

ok thats it. bb

if i had to deal with another person that is myself....

2009-09-07T03:01:00.000+08:00

i'd get tired of myself.

i should go slp...

dumb dumb eda eda dum dum
dum dum eda dum dumeda

dumeda edadum dum
edum!

=p

hacking is not nice.
cheat codes... are they a form of stratergy...

or is it bad to use them?
haha...

nites.

again...

2009-09-06T14:52:00.004+08:00

that song sung clear in my head again...

i'm not sure wether to hold on to that feeling.

i'd hate a repeatance to...um.. a certain thing.

its all so good now. i'd hate to ruin it.

but i'd hate it if i missed the opportunity.

i tripped on a pebble and fell hard.

if i hadnt taken the turn, i wouldnt have met the pebble.

if that person had not passed by on the same path, i wouldnt have tripped and fall.

fallling isnt such a bad thing. if only i can fall forever. lol

wth am i babbling about.

i loved JCIG camp.

i didnt want to leave.

i wanted to stay with everyone.

the friends i cherish most.

i dont know if we'll ever have such a lovely time as that. being together...

just being together.

its just beautiful.

comfortable.

... I'm going to sleep. i'm already home. the best i can do for now is to hope i'll see them again.
i want to.

i just have a nasty feeling....

i have a resolution. what happens will decide wether i'll do i or not. and the next step just depends.

ano koe ga kikitai, ano kao ga omou. ano egao ga mitai, ano chiisana nukumori wo hoshigaru.
subete wa anata kara dake de ii.

anata dake de ii.

its unfair, but forgive me.
i fear i'm selfish.

come back.

2009-09-06T10:46:00.002+08:00

Dont go away.
i want this to stay this way for a long time.

wah tah mell onn

2009-08-25T16:53:00.000+08:00

i want ice cream...

and watermelons...

and chocolates... Milk chocolate.. mmm

and cotton candy...

and cake...

and cream.

i don't care if i get fat =p

-by the crazy lady who's smelling curry from the kitchen and is slightly hungry.lol

.... randomness in fasting month

i wanna go eat at Sakura Buffet....
with alot alot ppl... JCIG ppl perhaps...
i wonder if we can rent out the whole place for jcig..=p

that would be nice mannnn

the only thing i'd probably eat is sushi and cakes/sweets.. and maybe MEAAAAAAAAATTTTTT

*watch nickelodeon*

xD

ya. and now my sis is mad at me...

2009-08-21T13:56:00.000+08:00

I AM TIRED.

1)chase ppl to collect ticket.
2)making sure ppl going knows the plan
3)mad sister.

i'm just tired. and i just woke up, so i'm not fully functional. i cant talk properly.

I gave up looking for the 3 people. let them look for me instead.

i got a little ticked at some people who i trusted to make sure others knew about the plan n stuff...
well thats a past. i think its solved. i really hope.

schedule. plans for tmr.
i have classes tmr

IN THE MORNING. like 8:30 start. meaning i have to wake up 6am

coz the place is so far awaaaayyyy

i cant possibly make changes to plans tmr.

so i need to finalize everythign TODAY!!!

...then my sis comes along and...

who wouldnt be irritated by noise when youre sleeping?... dont mind me being irritated for a bit la...

argh.... i dont want to make her angry, but if i shut up and et ehr make me feel irritated little by little, i'll really break something. ....

mdnipofgkhatnylrghoehj;tmbghg

WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO.

...

aye...

2009-08-21T01:59:00.001+08:00

its like, i'm making too much preparations for NM...
handling tix,
planning timing,
making sure everyone receive info...

if i were on the other side, looking at someone doing all this,
i'd criticize that person..

"why is she making such a big deal out of this? its just a Natsu Matsuri Festival what. next year also have.."

yeah. apparently i'm mad at myself for doing too much.

i'm worried that people wont get their tix...

BUT I BET THOSE PEOPLE ARE NOT AS WORRIED AS I AM lol...

at least rong ting smsed me, asked me about the tickets a few times before i got them from Ninomiya san.

the rest like...dont care wether they get the tix anot.(not counting the people i going with...coz i hold their tix till actual day.)

the rest of the ppl...they even paid the money... then like, dont care ar?
neer find me to ask where their tickets...

aiya you people

still expect spoonfeeding?

JCIG is not some automatic robot. we cant possibly do EVERYTHING for you... if i never gie the tix to you guys, wont be my fault already.

i mailed you ppl 2 times liao.

if tmr you ppl never appear, i dont care alr. =p

nights

Today was total Crap

2009-08-18T20:25:00.000+08:00

apart from the already occurring problems like Blogger 'create-post' page acting up, facebook page looks jumbled, and not being able to see my hotmail inbox unless on IE, i ran into a big mess today.

A-BLOODY-NNOYING

ARGH!!!

summarized:
-messy plans
-missing items
-mom didnt let me out
-wii spoilt
-queue at the supermarket was fking slow coz the cashier+customer damn...ARGH...
-twitter sms application didnt update

THE WORLD HATES ME TODAY.

kill me.

itchy fingers

2009-08-18T15:21:00.002+08:00

dug something out from the past.

*curses*

.....

there's such a thing as being too honest.
eda shouldn't talk so much.

somthing's wrong with my browser...

2009-08-17T20:06:00.000+08:00

or is it Mio? thinking its a stupid service now oTL..[><]!

lets see... Shin asked me "where's Brenda?"

i was about to answer..."dunno, why you ask me, u think i her secretary ah?"

...wait... in a sense... I AM her secretary! lol

...

ok i just dived into hot water...

@_@

Dusty is Fat =D

2009-08-14T10:59:00.000+08:00

i just saw him staring out the gate. and thats the first thing i thought of.

hope today's meeting goes well =)

here we go again...

2009-08-13T22:39:00.002+08:00

situation A

*A was told of an activity before it happens*
A: ... yeah.. so? nth to do with me ....

Situation B

*A wasnt told of the activity that was about to happen*
A: wahlao! never tell me la. leave me out sia...

so.... am i better off telling or not telling the person? lol...

Situation A1

*A tells B about something that A doesn't like about B*
A:you not happy with me izit?...
*A n B starts fighting*

Situation B1

*A is crying because of something about B*
B: why didnt you tell me before?! i could have changed u know....

would B have done so?
i doubt so. most people would think.. WHERE GOT?! when they hear someone saying something is wrong about them.

open your minds... dont let a few words from others make you break into an outrage.

LOL enough of that.

my examples are so .... singlish/beng-ish lol

sleepy now...

nights later.

bya

Eda no Mado

2009-08-12T17:53:00.005+08:00

That doesnt mean i'm mad.
it means Eda's Window.

xD

this is what it looks like when i'm sitting on my bed.

V the other side... V

FLY OUT@ xD nono jk

*shrug*

mwahahha....

i think i just saw my dad's car drive in the parking lot...

is it really it??.... hey sticking my head out is fun! lol

nope... it wasn't my dad's car... it went away... but hey! look at that car! the roof looks cool xD (cause its different)

laptop on mini table on bed beside window lol

yeah.. there's no point to this post. =D

Got to my music playlist and watch "Cherry Trees" Video.

2009-08-12T00:22:00.003+08:00

xD! Lol... title got nth to do with post.xD as usual i guess.

I love the lyrics, chorus and Vid.... its the kind of artistic i can vaguely understand...
what you don't understand, you shouldn't fear? Lol. in any case... the real post starts...

*laughs to self remembering what happened today*

...

quite a lot happened la.

i wore my new Blouse~ xD

Main event: Japanese students visiting RP.

played games,

gave out cards... oTL...

i find some things we do embarrassing... >
hope all of you had fun.

met 2 of the....4 or 5 new members...
Trevor and Mei Hsien.
They joined thru Paulene. =3

i'm jsut really happy coz i'm completely surrounded by friends today. teheh~

oh oh oh yeah! we played Saboteur!! LOLOLOL

yeah we played a card game after dinner..

Dinner at banquet. xD we should go buy the discount cards and go dinner there after every JCIG event/meeting! hohohoho~~~~

oh oh! before i forget to mention....

Brenda can blend wo well with my voice....nyaa... i kinda couldnt believe we were the ones making that music in the stairwell when we first practiced...

i think its all her doing though T_T i just sang plainly . xD
BRENDA NO KOE WA SUGOI DA YO~~~~
(i bet she will blur if she reading this =x)

well in anycase...

had a nice day.

^-^V

Eden of the East! lol... gonna watch that.(its an anime)
My sis is watching it right now...looks very interesting.

I'm reading Psychometer Eiji Manga...

and re-watching Tiger and Dragon drama...

xD!!!

RAKUGO!!! omg! eh!! .... YES!! her talk to me when i was about to find him ans ask him if he interested in rakugo talk.... wahahhahahahahahahahahah ...Quanta.lol

yeah.....lol

I wanna learn it and maybe i can introduce it to JCIG.... its Japanese tradition! =D lolol

tmr slp yaaaayy...lol

then collect yukata on thurs, go manga talk if can... thennext day mass meeting....whaaaa quite a lotta ningnongs to do ~ xD

ningnong!!! XD (doorbell sound)

eh one more random thing...

Nenek keropok~~~~

i got a nenek living in my house and these days, there's always keropok in the container on the dining table~~~

...== ok la ok la... lame la. xD!!!

my randomness got quite wild today.... lolol...

EDA CONTROL!!!!!!!

ok *in control*

too late for that now huh? like.. i'm at home... nobody will notice if i'm random ==

allright !! enough~ nuggets~~...er... NIGHTS!!

byabya~~~

Plans...

2009-08-10T17:39:00.002+08:00

11th, tues- Jap school students will be visiting RP...

13th, thurs- Manga Talk

14th, fri- Mass meeting

15th, sat- classes, accompany sis take passport, go STGCC

16th, sun - either go stgcc or go malaysia

22nd, sat- go Changi Jap Pri Sch Matsuri

25th, tues- go Jap Film Festival (Movie:House)**

29th, sat- Jap Film Festival again.(Movies: Onibaba and The ghost story of yotusya)**

22nd September=Rakugo **

Anyone up to go with me for the events with "**"??

xD

mhandhey

2009-08-10T14:21:00.002+08:00

whoever realize that the title reads 'Monday' please post 'Monday' on my tag. lol.

i just woke up...

my mp3 is still spoilt... irritating.

from my 1gb micro SD, i can only play 1 song. 1!!!
then it stops playing. there's this sound that speakers/earphones make when its working.
so i know it didn't switch off or anything....

i put in my 2gb MSD and i cant play a song at all... WHY!!!

i borrowed my sister's 2gbMSD and it works! it plays the songs without fail!
i'm gonna wait till my sis comes back home from wherever she is right now, then i'll check her MSD for whether it has anything that my SD may be missing.

that'll be the last thing i'll check. if it still doesnt work, i'm gonna mail the people who made my MP3... lol

hmm..

ok thats all for now. i havent started the day yet, so this is all i have. xD

Hap Nat Deh.

2009-08-09T23:48:00.003+08:00

Happy National Day la!...lol

Went to watch Fireworks with Mira.

i heard someone say: oh mak kau jantan!...
translation: oh your mother is male!
AHAHAHHAHAHA the woman who said that was tripping on something as she said that.lol

i shouldn't laugh... i (accidentally)said 'oh mak kau gorilla' before... [><]!!
well... all this 'oh mak kau ____' business is all accidental anyway.xD

I'm watching History of Singapore.
Interesting, really.

Ah. i'm tired =3
i drooled in the bus as i was sleeping =x
omg i admitted it. omg you read this.omgomgomg!
lol. its not like i drooled a bucketful. xD

i disturbed a bunch of people as i was waiting for the fireworks to go on just now. lolsxD

hmm... i... really miss someone.
*shrug* i think my subconscious may have caught on some of the stuff that I've been seeing around me, then rapped on the doors of my heart.
nostalgia and disgust sweeps over me for a second.
then usually, nostalgia stays on.
then disgust pops up once in a while.

in the end i'd think too much and ... oTL

I covered my ears under the blood red sky
I stopped feeling my life fading away.

Though this heart ache clearly makes me suffer so,
I don't know how to make a sad face.

I stood motionless on the scorched earth,
unconcerned with what is right and what is wrong.

The gentle warmth I had held precious, taken from me,
I lost even my anger, I merely want to sleep but,

I hear your voice, so I look for you
before this poison rain washes it all away

If we can make it back to that place,
we'll meet again with smiles.
Because when the tragedy has come to an end,
we'll see the answer.

The distant shining future we saw together,
I don't think it was this wasteland we see before us now.

I hear your voice, so I look for you
before this poison rain washes it all away
I need you to shine a light on the darkness,
This body about to fall apart needs you.

If we can make it back to that hill,
we'll meet again with smiles.
Surely in the season when this rain turns to snow.

....enough of that.

Ratatouille

2009-08-09T14:56:00.002+08:00

I watched the movie last night, and I'm watching it again.
every time i watch it, i realize i understand something i didn't notice about the movie before.

some words i didn't catch in the french accent perhaps, or the timeline.

This, i guess could be the reason why some call TVs an 'idiot box'.

Cause sometimes we watch, and we're just being fed stories. that's it.

in literature, you scrutinize text you're reading, find the meaning between the lines...

maybe i miss that. i realize that i miss that after realizing that i missed these few important details of the show...

fine. its not THAT important... but...*shrug* i think that its a good show. not great, super fabulous, but good. like chicken soup for the soul or something.

lol

allright stop crapping *out*

byabya

Lavender

2009-08-08T20:29:00.003+08:00

Come Back Home For Me Baby, once again
When I turn to look back it feels like youre still there
Where are you now? Who are you with? What are you doing?
A sorrowful melody echoes through the night streets

I Still Love You My Baby, forever more
Ever since we broke up Ive realized there are too many thing i cant forget.
I cant say goodbye, not even now
Because I dont want you to be a memory
Oh Please Dont Say Good Bye
________________________________________________
making the same mistakes,
wandering closer and closer to the end.

the wilting flower rots away, only a wish floats through the night
still now searching for you.

at least please smile under the same pale moon
because we can't do anything else
so at least please smile in the same passing seasons
if one day all this will vanish anyway.
___________________________________________________

random snippets from a couple of songs.

I'm sleepy.
watching ratatouille.
doing minutes.
i hope this is good enough ><> like how i missed what richard,Brenda Cs and Jared are saying about the CE points for the folk dance....>
argh.. just do what i can and send it i guess *shrug*

...

collected passport this morning.
funny. the woman was trying to be random, and i tried to bre random back but i was still half asleep.

took bus home. didnt know i could take from ICA buildng to bp by bus. hahaha

nyah. dono what else to say for now..byah

its irritating and i'm a bisket.

2009-08-07T01:20:00.002+08:00

if its irritating, stop looking, ne?

== eda eda when will you learn...

guess its not the matter of learning.

its the matter of sorting out my ... what's the word....desires(?)

if i could just identify what exactly is it that i want, then i can find other ways to get it than the current way this troublesome me is doing.

I keep troubling people...

I will stop myself as far as possible.

sometimes i realize too late. *shrug*

humans..

come back to the happier side...(reminded of the 'dark side' from practice room 1C)

start topic: Japanese Folk Dance.

Friday: Sensei, Richard, Kisa, Ernie, 3 other girls, Chigusa, one other guy and me turned up for the folk dance practice.
was normal. i learnt the dance. fun coz chigusa n i discovered the 'holy question'. i'll talk about that after this topic. hmm.. cant remember too much of that day.

Monday: got some kids in Yukata. started hanging more with Bev... correction, Bev hung around me. lol. nth much i guess? ah, we had full attendance and there was also more people.... alltogether 14 JCIG members including me...
Wibo n WJ .... wow 2 Ws... lol... er.. yeah they got in Yukatas... kakkoi~ teheh...
we had dinner again, Kisa Ernie Chiguchan CS Jared n me. went home late again, hohoho.... Jared started the 'i wanna be' song and we sang the intro a few times thru today. nuts.

Tuesday: all got in Yukatas except Wx2. take turns man.xD
as per usual. practice and all. had dinner again. found ot banquet can use the card. =D!!! i had like $11 left over from last meal with parents... so can buy nyam nyams. lol... $6 balance.

Wednesday: got a little bit aggravated by missing people. but ... what else can i do right? find them and drag them here? i cant scold them. they're adults. i wouldnt if i could anyway. *shrug*
its not a solution. the best solution then was to just move on. continue with practice.
Ticketing solved, ...hmm... ah we practiced on stage... i didnt sleep the previous night... lol just remembered.... non yukata practice. practice room 1C....
when we were about to leave, i flicked one of the switches and half the room went dark... i stood at the darker part and said to the people at the other side: Come to the dark side!!!
Jared n me went to scream in Brenda's ears on the way home...
Chiguchan brought home the speakers. arigatou!

kuzuboshi.... kirameku.... yume no...... hoshi sa.....
i wanna be....... ikouze...... ikouze...... iiiikoouuuZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

Thursday: actual day. Rumi got everyone in yukatas...Chiguchan had his hair tied up, then fringe also!! lolol!!...ok at first i thought maybe it could work... took a second, third and fourth look then ....ok take the fringe thing down. @_@ [><]!! the everyone looked darn good in yukata~~~ it was fun in itself, walking along friends in Yukata. ^^ its like this.."chiisana shiawase" moment... lol just made that up;little happiness... quanta took my pics homg.lol. aiyah... i kinda lazy to write every little detail la. just wrote what i rememebered at this moment. lol END TOPIC. start topic: the holy question. During sec one, I asked Ayu: do you watch magic knights rayearth? her answer: yes! then we were like: omg! then started to talk about it. the friendship started from this small spark of a question. ans we became vry good friends.
[[up or down, (or any other directions) we somehow find a way to stay friends. xP]]

guess what. Chiguchama told me the exact same story... like...
EXACTLY...

we somehow started to talk about MKR, then he mentioned that nas loves the show~
then he told me that he asked nas "do you watch MKR" during their sec1 year....

i was like O_O USO!!!
NHOO WHAAAAYYY!!!!!

and they've been friends ever since, and i can see that they're close coz at one time nas was like, in rp and hanging around Chigusa so i thought Nas was an RPian....@_@

holy biskets.

this must be the question we should ask to identify good friends!!!!

scenario:

a: hi, do you watch MKR?
b: oh, yes, i do!
a: (extend hand) HELLO GOOD FRIEND!!!!=D

LOL~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ xDDDD

ok enough... sleepy. tmr goin kissa. byah

Good Morning~

2009-08-05T07:18:00.002+08:00

yeah... i didnt sleep...lol

lookie. the blogskin changed~~ xD

nope, the 'fuzzy watermelon' URL stays.

i dont like to change URLs a lot... i only changed it about... less than 5 times...?

*counts properly*

sweet nightmare,
sweet watermelon
fuzzy watermelon...

yeah. moved only 2 times since 2005.
thats very little compared to some other bloggers out there.
some change like, every 3 days or something. like changing clothes.lol

always had the notion to change fuzzy to red-ness... lol

Kirito.
he loves adding deep red flowers, and scattering petals into his songs...
in a way, thats how i plucked my jap name.

Makka na hana.
sotto.

hihihihi... irritating error pop up ahahahaha

eh, eh... if i really never take nap later right... you dancers watch out ar...

if i'm sleep deprived, i'll be weirder than my normal weird. xD
i think. hohohoho.

woots Valentine's Kiss song by Shiraishi: love me DOOOOOOOO~~~~~ ahhahaha cute sia.

orig song by Onyanko Club.xD

Banana also by Onyanko le...

yayness~~xD

wakakakkaka

shalalala~ suteki ni kiiiisu~

oldies rox =3

kyaa. kawaii~~ Yuujiroh chan~~ wahahhaha

otono no aji ne~~~ ahahhaha *laughs to self *

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA nyyyaaa!!! KYAAAA nyuuu bubble bubble =3

tehehehee... i should stop listening to such songs! dammit.

Koe

2009-08-05T03:19:00.002+08:00

Ahhh~~ the voice's refreshing~~ =3

thanks to my dear friend...>.> [Ah-Yu]=x [eheh okok Yuyu]
whom i asked my first holy question>.>

I may be returning to the 2D world T_T

its not so sad la, but WHAT A WAY TO RETURN!

my gosh. look. got 2 nicknames already.
"oyasumi chan" and "bandage guy".... wth~~

nnyaaaahhh his voicee... NYAAAhhhhh

*kyaas alone in a corner*..... omg its been a long while since i did that...

KYAA!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and i'm gonna start drawing again...
i got inspired to draw again after chancing upon WJ+Bo's yukata pics again and again while i'm browsing thru pics on my desktop...oTL...

i got a whole lot of pics on my desktop and transfered/downloaded pics are saved in my desktop...so... yeah... T_T *keeps them in JCG file* stop popping up ....*curse yukatas silently*

this song is ticklish =p

I"M MAAAAAAAAAAD!!! lololol wahhahah i can laugh when i'm mad.

*remembers convo about horoscopes* homg .......
ok i dowan say...

omg so funny laaaaaa~~~ this soooonnnggg hahahahha =x

what was i talking about again?

NVM AHAHAHAHAHHAA...

OMG SANADA!!! (minus 100000exp) *DIES*!!!
-system is unable to send eda back to the nearest town to be revived. good luck-

Eda: WHYYYY!!!

sys: you have heard the forbidden epic song. you deserve to die. eff off.

Eda: WTH! crazy system...*quits game*

MY GOSH!! WHATS WITH THE KYAAH AT THE BACK MY GOSH KIMOCHIWARUI AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ITS SO DISTURBING, I NEED TO SHARE IT WITH SOMEONE!! OMG AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHELP MHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

fuh... its been a while. really... feels good. like i'm home.

Tadaima.

Headache

2009-08-04T21:01:00.001+08:00

...

Am i missing anyone?

2009-08-04T00:13:00.002+08:00

I fixed the links.
re-added ones that i added AFTER the skin change
and relinked ones that changed after the blogskin change.

those who I've left out, do tell me! [><] i forgot who i linked or didnt link.

I enjoyed myself today.
i did some random things i don't understand myself.
for instance, suddenly screaming 'shut up' for no proper reason. 0_0?

my lagginess never ceased to amaze me.

and i mentioned before: I'm dense at times. I don't get it, you'll have to tell me..

maa... come back.

one of my 3 greatest weakness against appearance of guys appeared today.
and it'll be there again tmr.
and the next day.....
and the next!

its a good thing coz i get to see.
its a bad thing coz the ugly side of me might really show. x.x

i should really keep my fantasies to myself >< lol

nyaa gomen. [><]!!

i really need someone to stop me. from the madness i drive myself into sometimes [><]!aaaaahhhh

whenever i hearmyself scream in frustration, that song plays in my head....

"行き場の無い焦燥　この愛の荷重差
yukiba no nai shousou kono ai no kajuu sa
This uneasiness has no place to go. It is overloading my heart.

あああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああ"

http://dialaurel.exteen.com/20090216/ai-wa-sensou-love-is-war

KIMI WO MAMORU YO

KORE WO SENSOU!1

*sings rest of the chorus that can be found in the link above*

hmm... "kimi wo mamoru yo"
there's an idea...

i'll protect 'you'. in my memory. the 'you' in my memory will stay innocent and dear.
I'll protect that 'you'.that you only. thats the only way i can think of. because i really do not want to hate anyone. especially those i hold most dear to my heart. even if it was only once upon a time.

its really sad to hate one you once loved.(thinking of someone else's situation...)

-end of random secretive ...i dunno what that was really..-

ON TO OTHER STUFF...

i cant stop laughing at the Gif of 'brown' from 'purple and brown' that my sis saved on my desktop.
i'm using it as a DP now. xD!! NOM NOM

oh yah, Higuchi san mailed me again =3...

He's the guy from last year's performance that was held in RP.
in the cards that we gave them as tokens, we wrote our mails in.

he mailed me one fine day,
i replied to his mail, and we never exchanged anymore.

i think i accidentaily invited him to oovoo... >
he gave me his skype ID and twitter page instead, =3

tehehehehe~~~.. i is evil...

i wanna follow his twitter.... but... shy ar...[><]!

in his mail, he mentioned and sent a pic of his club members who got married.

i thought it was sweet =3

allright i'm getting irritated by this autosave and its lagginess....

irk.
i was irked. here n there i was irked.
wont say anymore. byah!

Idiocy

2009-08-02T20:12:00.002+08:00

i have a lot of things i wanna complain about but i dont wanna start coz it will never end.

so i distract myself by writitng the stuff i need to do/say to ppl.

"Brenda, i need the lecture theater booking asap, i need Melvin to open the helicon room on monday and you or CS to open the cupboard so that i can get the Yukata... I also need to know if we can get the money to buy 3 Male Yukatas ASAP. we should buy them and use them for practice.. actual day is really near already."

must remember to being weijie's keychain on monday.

MEAT.

stfu.

enough.
bye

Non Omnis Moriar,,,

2009-08-02T04:00:00.002+08:00

it was like taking a long break.

I hoped it to be this way.

shrug it off and move on, ne?

we proved that such a thing can happen.

yay us.
lol

...aiya random sia me.
nights.

WANTED:

2009-08-01T00:00:00.002+08:00

-Female mannequins
-Male Yukata
-Japanese Folk Dancers

AT A PRICE CLOSE TO NOTHING.

er... the folk dancers dont get a pay, but they get benefits. =)

PM/Email me for more details.

by the way....

JCIG news....

Mass meeting to be held on Thursday, 6th August.

shichimenchou wa yappari tereru.

2009-07-30T21:10:00.002+08:00

ore wa mada mada chikin raisu de ii ya.

HAHA!
what a way to compare something to Hamada's song!

maa.

shall we have a breakdown of things?

JCIG has been a mess to me.
Its always been a mess.
One that the Committee is constantly required to clean up.

SAIGANG WARRIRORS FTW~

lol.

its 'beautiful' how the mess keeps piling up.

i'm sorry to those who dont see it. because those who dont see it will think that the IG is doing nothing. the commitee is doing nothing.
then they might get bored. ... i'm just saying. purely hypothetical.

well...

we'll do somthing about this. of course.

we'll have some activities, of course.

as always, commitee will do our best for JCG.

do note that committee personels are still human beings.

as for me, i think we're still new..
and i'm very noob at management and being a secretary.

bear with us for a while.

and dont make a mess while youre at it =p

lol.jk

eda out----------+

Himitsu

2009-07-29T15:53:00.004+08:00

i stopped blogging a few days ago and turned my attention to venting by other means.

man did i write a lot.

i'll revert my blogskin to my previous one.

its kinda a 'reset' thing i'm doing

having a headache.

i also blog random stuff on some other blog...

i share it with someone else.

wonder if anyone will find out what blog it is,who i share it with and any other detail.. lol...

i'll give a keychain to whoever gets it.. lol its really simple, actually.

right,, i'll go change the blogskin now...

( Reset)

shit. i forgot to save the html for my LM.C skin.

ah heck. doesnt matter...

EHHH!!!!...... wh-wha-..... shit. nvm. i wont say.

How to rule the world...Eda's way.

2009-07-24T12:25:00.002+08:00

screaming in head:

I AM GONNA RUUULE THE WORL-

*accidentally bangs head into toilet door because the knob cannot be turned fully* ...

=.=

geh.

Ame da.

2009-07-24T04:41:00.002+08:00

it started raining...

i suddenly felt really happy. xD

i'm not too sure why.

but impulse tells me to stick my head out onto the windowsill ans go to sleep.

like the last time.

there was a cool night, slightly brighter than most nights...
i just opened the window(which is the same level/height of the top-bunk of my bed)

and i just slept with my head out of the room.

...
when i woke up, my parents/sis were scolding me...i think.

xD

but its such a waste not to take advantage of the scene when the window is just right beside your bed.

hoho... i've always imagined leaving the windows open and going to sleep...
and then i'd imagine rolling off the bed.... towards the window. =p~

i'd fall to my demise~ xD

OMG~ xD

about an hour ago, i saw a guy walking his dog.... 3am+ in the morning walk the dog int he rain??/ 0_0

then when i took a look out the window a few seconds ago, i saw a rat scurry under a car....
rat... or cat...
cant judge the size from this height. especially not after just having a glimpse of it.

i need to go library read books man...

i feel my English dropping. one of my pride and confidence in life.lol

hai~ this is nothing!

xD time to sleep with ehad poking out of the window. xD

GOAL!!

2009-07-24T02:27:00.002+08:00

and we celebrate!

and we cheer

and we party

and we are happy

and we enjoy ourselves.

....

....i was about to write something to spoil the whole thing. =p

end.

...

2009-07-23T12:40:00.003+08:00

tools need to be cared for too.

feels enigmatic.

monotonous.

I'm on my own.

I can anticipate what some people will be thinking now.

nevermind.

whats the use.

why should i bother.

i still care.

but at a lesser scale.

hmn... i just realised a way to distort someone...
coz i know what you're doing...

i just wont. being the nice person i am.

=)

do you trust me?
hahaha...

random

2009-07-23T06:04:00.005+08:00

guess. no, wait. don't.

long, light colored hair(max. slightly longer than shoulder length)

white uniform(navy? or maybe military?)

'megane'(bespectacled)[recent]

fun/funny

'its okay to be idiotic sometimes'

random.

dark/mysterious demeanor(or should i say past?)

gentlemanly

slightly scheming...(keeps torments at slightly more than minimum =x)

atama ga ii =3

will tell. will tell. will tell! <[wth right?

ijou.

scary over.

2009-07-23T05:51:00.002+08:00

and anyway.

my decision making towards certain things are not strong...

blah.

Wibo's right.
I'm too easily influenced.
there. i'm influenced by his remark already. ==

...forget it.

i just need to forget about this certain thing and dont bother bout the details.
it'll be fine coz i'm not obliged. its not me. i will not be held responsible.
there i go again~

i'm like a stupid kite.
someone needs to tie me down.

WHAT KIND OF ANALOGY IS THAT
=D

maybe i just dont feel stable.
maybe i've had too much freedom thanks to my parents.
maybe i'm just too used/addicted to this fun.
murder me.

icchan, tasukete.

onegai...

=)

2009-07-22T22:25:00.002+08:00

today was like... diverse?

woke up, had things ready.

added stuff on my to do list...

i mailed the mannequin supplier and a person called me as i was about to leave the house.

that was fast! forgot to thank him.
*checks on business etiquette*

went for meeting with Jared n CS.
ok. so we got somethings down...

i'll have to really write down stuff.
coz i keep forgetting.
there's quite some things i need to do.

WJ, please don't let my emotions get to you. =p
Kira stop attempting to kill me... xD

back to what i was saying...
attendance. those who came, thanks.
thats all.

we got quite some cardboards. lovely.
thanks Z n ED for letting us keep them at your houses.=3

then we discovered eating the wrong thing....
Yiting the Rong Ting... get it?... nevermind.

ED, thanks for making my day.
=) the chocs were delicious!

dammit... i cant resist white chocolate T_T
anyway... i'm VERY sleepy right now.... lets say 10 random things then go slp...

1-Kami ga suki
2-kami wo miru no koto mo suki.
3-dammit. why must some ppl have nice hair... make me stare you know. =3
4-heheh.yeah. i dont care anymore.
5-wait... the first and second point is actually summarized by the third point... that makes it 1 point right?
6-so i have like... 2 points in total =) (cause this point n point 5 are related too)
7-go ahead.
8-yes i'm mad. i'm madly *r*y*m*sh**~~~ >=x
9-i'm going woodlands then chinatown tmr..=) who want follow?
10-i'm going soft... stupid da. what happened to you.>=|

今日のミーチング、お疲れさまでした～
kyou no meeting no minna, otsukaresamadeshita~ =)
(everyone of today's meeting, thanks for the good work!)

nights.

bya.

hi TWO

2009-07-22T13:12:00.000+08:00

thanks for reading T_T

sometimes..

2009-07-22T11:58:00.002+08:00

doing the right thing is wrong.

*shrugs*

timing is everything.

too bad we cant control it.

but its beautiful when things just falls into place.
like a sick joke that life is.

by sick joke, i don't mean it in a negative way....
its like... a coincidence beat all odds, the chances were very low... like 0.1%...
but it happened.

and it happened for the good.
and it happened at a nice time
and it happened the way we never expected it to.

its beautiful and sick at the same time.
and it doesn't stop there

it continues to branch out and create a chain of 'coincidences'
which in turn makes me believe its not a coincidence at all.

"destiny"
"fate"
"inevitable"

the kinds of things that come to mind when these things happen.
if its big, i'm truly happy.
if its the smaller bits, it'll make my day.

++++++++

i'm addicted to something.
and its not so good.
icchan, save me.

Frankly

2009-07-21T18:19:00.000+08:00

it was just a petty quarrel.
no need to stick your nose in it and blow your snot to the fire.
yes. your snot is flammable.

LOL

xD

byabya

Koi wa sensou

2009-07-21T00:56:00.003+08:00

Love is War.

...its just a song. xD

kimi wo mamoru yo!
kore wa sensou!

this guy's scream-singing is somehow attractive.
*plays song repetitively*

how can you judge me just based on that?
xD

huh? what? wrong channel. LOL!

.retteb steg ti .redrah kool
...i wrote something else here but i erased it...

ah shut up.
keep diggin my own grave.

speaking of which, one word.... "blunder" =x

ah, someone spoke to me just now...
i couldnt say anything back...
just... unfair.

cant there just be friendship?
*erased again*
whats with the rest of the ppl ==

i was about to say that i have a slight same problem...
but... its not the same.

i keep wanting to tell others, reassure them that they're not alone...
but if i think about it, their situations may only remind me of mine.

maybe they're not similar at all. jsut my brain which like to make connections so much.
from what newly experience to what i have already or currently am experiencing.

so i cant say anything.

it'll just give me an opening to complain. lol.

even if its very similar, it may be differnt in a sense.
the sense that cant be explained in words.

*erased more content here*

talk too much not good.

things are good if they are said,
but some thigns are better let unsaid after all...

coz its pointless to say it.
it'll just confuse.
*more erased content*

seriously.

stop reading this!

you bored ar?

read my post for what.. go someone else's blog where they ont write crap like i do xD

lolol

i^,＼　＿,,＿／＾ｌ
　　ｌノ　　　　　　ヾﾉ
　　ｼ "　ヽ､_ 　_ノﾐ
　ﾒ　　（○）　（○）　ヽ
　彡三⌒（__人__）⌒三ミ　
　　ヾ　　　＾　　　ﾝ

stole frm white order chat frm wj....

lol... maybe alignment not proper. hahah

dont care...

nights

Experiment... Fail?

2009-07-20T02:07:00.001+08:00

i used email to post...(see post below)

emails have those footnotes...
so... hmmm....

doesnt matter right...?

lol oh well.

xD

Sugoi... ka na?

2009-07-20T02:05:00.001+08:00

Lets try this out!

Ok that’s Nagase Tomoya.

Post for fun

Cause I’m posting this post through email.

If this works, I’ll post pictures through outlook next time.

Because outlook is so much easier to use compared to having to edit and upload pictures uses blogger upload.

Well, if I have only a few pics ar.

Outlook cannot upload more than certain amount right. Lol

Oh well… here goes!

Ps: yes. I’mma noob. I never explored blogger this far.

*sends*

Republic Polytechnic, 9 Woodlands Avenue 9, Singapore 738964
www.rp.sg . Fax: +65 6415-1310 .
Republic Polytechnic, championing Problem-Based Learning for an inspired education in Singapore.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CONFIDENTIALITY CAUTION: This message is intended only for the use of the individual or entity to whom it is addressed and contains information that is privileged and confidential. If you, the reader of this message, are not the intended recipient, you should not disseminate, distribute or copy this communication. If you have received this communication in error, please notify us immediately by return email and delete the original message. Thank you.

cozfest post.

2009-07-19T23:51:00.000+08:00

http://rpjcg.blogspot.com/2009/07/cozfest-09.html

posted on JCIG blog. lol...

FAIL!

2009-07-19T19:50:00.000+08:00

see more Fail Blog

UBERFAIL~~

its been a very long while....

2009-07-19T01:30:00.002+08:00

since i've held a pen that long....

about 4 hours editing a picture.

i mess up a lot. *shrugs*...

and i kept having to redo the outlines...
and i do a lot of manual work...

tired. xD

parents came back from 'honeymoon' about 2 hours ago. Okaeri~ =3

tmr going malaysia... but i dun wanna.
i dont think i'll benefit from going there. i'll just sit all day gawking at the window.
then i'll either get carsick, or get bored, or sleep.

i'll only want to go there if i know i'll get something somehow...
yes. selfish me =p

but its better than wasting my time sitting in the car all day.
even if we went shopping, we'd be WINDOW shopping.T_T

saa... i think i have quite a To Do list building up now...
and there's the ~~irritating~~ little problems here and there popping up...

OTL i gotta learn how to say 'no' again... i keep accepting when people ask me for favors...
like the image editing thing...
i could have said no....
gah ==

allright thats it for now...

nights

Nicely Weird, Weirdly Nice.

2009-07-17T21:55:00.001+08:00

weird day.

there was a nice inpromptu-ness,

followed by some frustration.

then "KIMETA"

then tranquility washed over me...

then a fun game... saboteur was damn fun!

then a slight headache... lack energy i guess?

then ...fear?.... kimochi warui... serious... i flinch/ get a chill down my spine whenever i think of it...
aaaahhh dame dame dame!

ICCHAN!... ...

well, that came out of nowhere. lol...
dont try to figure that out...=p

thats all for today...

feels really sleepy all of a sudden.

maa, kyou wa tanoshikatta. dakara.. ii ne?.... sono koto wo kangaemasen!....*shiver*
daijobu da..... kitto daijobu><
*hide under blanket*

dammit.

Oyashumi nashai~

shoulder pain T_T

2009-07-16T22:32:00.000+08:00

lol....

bisket. =x

I WAN CHANGE BLOGSKIN LA!.... lol...
put a personal touch...

i remembered 'mission accomplished' ... in a bus. when i was the naive bisket i am.... do you remember?
we were visiting a school. haha!

Haha!

2009-07-16T14:44:00.002+08:00

omg look at what my mom sent me (sms)

my mom so cute sia...

helo ida,ibu ada d(mom is at) canopy walk at taman negara.i almos canot make it uphill.now waitin 4 aya(dad) to comback from climbing anoter hil.so fun!u can look into de iternet.ceeya later!(:

xD!

夢のサンクチュアリー

2009-07-16T04:02:00.003+08:00

i want to dream.

and stay in that dream.

.... i think my fear of the dark has returned.... with a vengence...
should i even be writing this for you guys to read..? lol